Description:

Drawing from reams of historical data, laboratory experiments, field research, and eyewitness accounts, this comprehensive and illustrated guide is the only book you'll need to face the greatest challenge mankind has ever encountered. Granted, you probably already know that skills such as wilderness survival, leadership, and basic first aid are important when fighting off hordes of the undead. But The Zombie Survival Guide doesn't stop there, teaching you how to: Identify cases of infection by the zombie virus, Solanum, and recognize the hourly progression of symptoms: 'Hour 8: Numbing Of Extremities And Infected Area, Increased Fever [103-106 Degrees], Increased Dementia, Loss Of Muscular Coordination'; choose the right weapon: 'A Section Of Lead Pipe Will Work For A Single Encounter But Is Too Heavy For Those On The Move'; defend your home: 'A Ten-Foot Cinder-Block Wall, Reinforced Wih Steel Rods And Filled With Concrete, Is The Safest Barrier In Both Class 1 And Class 2 Outbreaks'; and much more. Filled with helpful illustrations and a sample 'Outbreak Journal' that should be kept on your person at all times, The Zombie Survival Guide is the only guide you will need to survive a most certain pandemic. 'Ignorance is the undead's strongest ally, knowledge their deadliest enemy,' Brooks writes. 'Personal choice, the will to live, must be paramount when the dead begin to rise. The choice is up to you.' ** ### From Publishers Weekly In this outrageous parody of a survival guide, Saturday Night Live staff writer Brooks prepares humanity for its eventual battle with zombies. One would expect the son of Mel Brooks to have a genetic predisposition to humor, and indeed, he does, and he exhibits it relentlessly here: he outlines virtually every possible zombie-human encounter, drafts detailed plans for defense and attack and outlines past recorded attacks dating from 60,000 B.C. to 2002. In planning for that catastrophic day when "the dead rise," Brooks urges readers to get to know themselves, their bodies, their weaponry, their surroundings and, just in case, their escape routes. Some of the book's more amusing aspects are the laughable analyses Brooks proposes on all aspects of zombiehood, and the specificity with which he enumerates the necessary actions for survival-i.e., a member of an anti-zombie team must be sure to have with him at all times two emergency flares, a signaling mirror, daily rations, a personal mess kit and two pairs of socks. Comic, though unnecessarily exhaustive, this is a good bet for Halloween gag gifts and fans of Bored of the Rings-esque humor. 100 line drawings. Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc. ### Review "'So meticulous and well researched that it's more scary than funny. This book lays out everything you need to know to protect yourself from flesh-eating monsters' - Esquire 'A bloody-minded, straight laced manual for evading the grasp of the undead' - Time Out 'A tome you start reading for fun and then at page 50 you go out and buy a machete just to be on the safe side' - New York Post 'Ignorance is the undead's strongest ally, knowledge their deadliest enemy. Personal choice, the will to live, must be paramount when the dead begin to rise. The choice is up to you.' (from The Zombie Survival Guide)"